The World officially registered as Tockari 27 is better known to it's many visitors as "New California" due to being totally made of nothing else but Sand and Sea (and endless Sunshine). It has a strange and unique 'tidal flow', in which rather than the sea moving in or out the land rises and falls in a very gradual manner. Although the feeling seems very natural and reminiscent of Earth's beaches, a few visitors have been caught out and been washed out to land.
This song introduces the new line-up for the band (Nov 2013)......
Randolph Swain - Vox
James Rigg - Guitar
Fitz - Bass
Craig Rostock - Drums
DON'T GET CAUGHT IN THAT HOLE
Transmission between Chief of the Space Corp- John Cooper - and his chief scientist -Napoleon Dawkins
DAWKINS : Sir, I have some concerns about the Black Hole mission:
We at Science Division developed Kelvinite specially for this mission. It's the lightest, most robust construction material we've ever had. It's unique thermal properties and strength make it the only sensible option to build a spacecraft hull for a mission such as this. Why have you chosen Kolanar instead?
What is Kolanar, never heard of it? Who is this AR27 division who developed Kolanar?
Why are we sending Swain???
COOPER: OK Dawkins, let me give you a few facts.
Great work with Kelvinite but it's damn expensive. Kolanar is a lot cheaper.
Our mission analysts have run countless computer simulations and they tell me that a mission to the Black Hole at Universe Centre has a probable success of 3%, even with the best ship and the best crew. Our Russian colleagues agree.
Let me remind you that we're only flying this mission to keep the President happy.
So with such a low chance of success why spend a lot of money on the ship?
That's also why I chose Swain and his bozos to crew it.
Between you and I, AR27 is the Martian colony aluminium recycling plant.
They had a thousand metric tons of waste drink cans they wanted to get rid of so that's Kolanar.
I told Swain that AR27 are a top secret Advanced Research Division and that Kolanar was “The real thing”
He bought it!
DAWKINS : I see.
But if the Russians know the mission's doomed why give us an Andropov Prize winning astrophysicist as Science officer?
COOPER : I wondered about that as well so I did some research.
Turns out the “Andropov Prize” was his universities prize for best costume at their annual fancy dress ball.
The guy went as Groucho Marx.
His costume was so bad, the judges thought he was meant to be Stalin and gave him first prize.
I believe a lot of vodka was involved.
DAWKINS : Ah.
Isn't this a little unethical though?
Sending Swain and his guys on a doomed mission in a ship made of drink cans?
Oddly, I think if anyone can do this it's Swain.
He may be a lousy astronaut but my god, he's lucky!
Remember his Lunar training mission?
DAWKINS: How could I forget?
We spent weeks looking for him then we got that transmission.
“Swain here. Established Lunar Orbit. It's bigger than I expected.. Close up it's really yellow and bright..... and hot.......Shit, shit, shit!”